Upcoming North Carolina Tournaments

Monday, October 4, 2010

The Battle of Five (or More) Warhammer Armies

So I've written up a scenario that we'll hopefully be playing here in the next few months.  I like to watch this for inspiration:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y30LAj502mY


Scenario:  The Battle of the Five (or more) Warhammer Armies
Players:  Five (or more).  Fluffwise, these consist of two or more forces of order armies, Skaven, Beastmen, Lizardmen, and Orcs.  Feel free to swap out armies if convenient.
Points:  2,500 points outer (evil) army.  3,000 points per (center table) army.  These points should adjust to provide some semblance of balance (at about a 10:6 ratio), although evil should always outnumber good.
Deployment:  The center table defenders deploy anywhere on the center table.  The outer table attackers deploy within 12” of their outer board edges. 
First Turn:  Defenders go first
Game Length:  The Game will last for six turns, or until a time limit is reached.
Victory Conditions:  Each player has secret conditions. 
Scenario Special Rules:  Lots!  Coming Soon!

Bobo was scared.  He’d stolen the Ring from the scary dragon, Flogg, just like the old Sorcerer Randalf had asked him to do, but ever since then, things had gone horribly wrong.  Randalf and the Dwarfs that were supposed to protect him were drunk, Flog the Dragon was pissed, and Bobo’s pants were sopping wet down the front. 
“No worries, Bobo”, grinned Randalf, “I’ve got this here horn, and I’ll blow on it to summon some allies to help us out.  Pretty soon, we’ll be up to our arses in archers and eagles”. 
Randalf whipped out his horn and went to blow.  Unfortunately, his mouth was still filled with “pipeweed” smoke, and a hacking cough struck him just as he sounded the horn.  The resulting note sounded something like a cross between a startled sheep and a wet fart.

Beastlord (or Beastlady, as she preferred) Gortia Gorson led her herd through the woods around Mount Boom carefully.  No longer satisfied with petty loot and plunder, Gortia had become a militant anti-man zealot after a late night jam session with her Gor-crush Malagor at the Herd Stone last Boxing Day.  She was on the lookout for any settlements to defile, loot, and hopefully poop on. 
Randalf’s “note” sounded in the air.  To all the Beastmen, it sounded like the world’s most awesome Bray-Horn.  Gortia smiled and turned to address her herd.   
“Let’s get moving, boys!  There’s more Beasts ahead!

Randalf looked down at the horn and frowned.  Whatever note he had blown, it hadn’t summoned much help.  Bobo looked even more terrified, and several Dwarfs looked ready to sick up. 
“Ah ha!”, exclaimed Randalf, “I’ve got the ticket!  What I’ll do is jazz up the next note with a little Razzle Dazzle Magic ™.”  He sniffed at the Winds of Magic.  They seemed pretty ripe!
Glowing with power, Randalf blew into the horn.  On the plus side, the horn blew a perfect, beautiful note.  On the down side, Randalf exploded.
When the smoke cleared, Bobo and the Dwarfs found Randalf stunned on the ground.  “Well”, groaned Randalf, “I sounded the horn with Irresistible Force.  Unfortunately, that’s also a miscast in this edition”. 

To the east, the Eagles and their Wood Elf friends heard Randalf’s call, and took to the air immediately to go to his aid.  The majestically soared over the trees, true friends and allies to Randalf’s cause.  Sadly, as they flew, the air around them grew hot and then exploded in a white hot burning ball of unnatural miscasted Strength Ten D6 Wound Ouchies.  When the light cleared, only a few eagles remained, and the green fields and trees below had been replaced with a squalid swamp and unnatural temple.  Lizardy eyes glared up at the eagles.
“What. The. Croak.”, snapped the High Slann Slippimus Prime.  “I don’t know what jerk mage summoned us up on accident, but we’re going to follow those feather Pteradons up there and kick his butt”. 

Meanwhile, up in “Da Hills”:
“Boss, we’ve been after these Stunties for days”, complained a Big’Un, “When are we gonna bash sum heads?”
General Bork gave his troops the stinkiest eye an Orc can give. 
“Shut it up, you lot!”  He chopped a nearby Gobbo in half in irritation. “We’ve almost caught ‘em.  I can feel it.  Plus, listen to dat racket down there near the mountain. We’ll smash ‘em up good, and Gork’ll be proud.  Chargelzors!”

The woods were rustling, there was a new swamp to the east, the sounds of a Waaaagh could be heard from the hills, and most of the Eagles were BBQ.   Even Randalf looked worried. 
The only place left to look for help was to the west, in the small settlement of Durham nearby.  Randalf tooted despondently on the horn again, hoping to summon some men, at least.  Amazingly, he saw men approaching!  Unfortunately, they looked like they were in bad shape. 
One of them screamed, “We’ve been swarmed by rats!” and fainted dead away.  Bobo peed in his pants a little more. 

In Durham, Gray Seer Burns stroked his whiskers.  “Exxxxcelent!”, he hissed.
The plan to take Durham had gone well, using only some cheese, a Pied Piper, and twelve cucumbers.  His alliance with the Vampires was underway…for now…and no man-thing remained in the town.  Burns could now launch his raid on Mount Boom, and steal all of its magical artifacts.  Enough Slaves could take down a dragon, and no other inconveniences could stand in his way.  Mounting his Bell, Burns screamed to the sky.
“Rat-ulators!  Mount up!”

All around the Dwarfs, things were going badly.  Nowhere seemed safe, and the Dragon was coming out from the mountain.  They had some guns, and some knights, and quite a few peasants, but they were completely surrounded!
Bobo had to get out of here!   His hand crept towards the Ring….

1 comment: